The Perfect Embodiment

You Still Haunt Me

I loved the Winter. I liked the cool breeze hitting my face and seeing the soft snow everywhere. I liked stepping suddenly on a patch of ice and gliding across of it, it was so fun when I slipped and landed on my bottom side. I can remember the way we used to laugh at my clumsiness. But today was different. The Winter was here, the breeze was still hitting my face, the snow was everywhere, that patch of ice was there, but you're not here to laugh at me when I fall.  

I can still see your beautiful face with that amazing smile of yours as you helped me up. I can feel your warm arms wrap around me when you pulled me into that hug. Your kisses, which I can feel on my lips, still haunt me. You still haunt me no matter where I go. You're everywhere I turn, you're always by my side. You're next to me when I go to bed, you're sitting beside me when I awake. You still haunt me. 

Looking back to those days, we were so young and foolish. How we used to tell one another "I love you" when we didn't even know what it meant. How we used to playfully kiss each other just out of curiosity. When we promised that we would forever be together, just you and I. It was us against the world. 

I remember so clearly like if it was yesterday. Our first real date, our first real kiss, our first real fight, the first heartbreak. I remember how the next you would say that everything would be okay, and it would be. We would forget about everything and go on as if nothing ever happened. I can still remember the first time we said "I love you" and actually meant it. The first time you invited me over to your new apartment and how we ended up in bed together. You were my first everything and my last too. 

Those memories are the only things I have to cherish. I'll treasure them forever, keeping them safely locked away inside of my heart. I feel the sudden chilly breeze stroke my face and I imagine your soft hand soothing me. I can feel the tears strolling down my cheeks and how they start to freeze on my face. I wipe them away, swallow down the pain and keep walking, no destination in mind. I just want the time to remember you, to remember us. 

In-caged within my thoughts, the patch of ice goes unnoticed. I step on it, glide and eventually slip, falling right onto my back. God, the sky never looked so beautiful. The stars never shone so bright. I'm helpless trying to stand up on my own, now what did I get myself into. I should have been paying more attention, instead I was too busy drowning in the past.  

At my last failed attempt to stand, I just lay back and think about the future. I close my eyes and I can hear your laughter, poking fun at how "cute I look when I'm mad". I smile and I can feel those damn tears coming back. I swear I could sense your presence here with me, I swear I can still hear your voice now closer. I swear I can still feel your hand in mine, trying to get me back up. Am I really imagining this?  

I open my eyes and I find myself standing straight up. I swear I can see you standing there before me, with that beautiful smile of yours. You look like an angel with that radiating light surrounding you. I felt your arms around me, I heard you whisper how silly I was and will always be. I heard you say those magical words: I love you, always will. Then I feel your lips on mine, still warm to the touch. I feel you pulling away, but I refuse to let you go again. 

All is in vain and I see you farther away from me. Your beautiful light now fades into darkness and you're gone. But you're always there, I know you are. Damn, how you still haunt me.