nemesais: (entoan plushie)
Today I went out with dad. We bought a few things at the hardware store. He bought me a blender! I'm so happy because I've always wanted one. Now I can make smoothies and stuff. He also got me heavy duty carpets for my SUV so the original ones don't get dirty. After that we got frozen yogurt then came home. I worked out for 30 minutes today since the previous day I had done 60 minutes. I really hope I'm making progress. I feel great about myself (emotionally and mentally). I'll be upset though if my weight hasn't changed much.

I got my laptop back but I doubt I'll be able to play Smite anymore. I need to get a better cooling pad for it. I'll buy it soon. Then when I start working I can get a better PC.

Anyways, nothing much has happened. Washed my hair and now I'm watching Investigation Discovery. They have some shows on Ted Bundy. It may sound weird, but I like stuff about true crimes. Anything to do with psychology or psychiatry are my favorite things. And paranormal subjects as well.
nemesais: (Default)
Today I woke up feeling like hell because last night I was so hyper and couldn't sleep. I think I feel asleep at around 4 am and only because I forced myself. I got up at 12 pm and ate some tortillas with cheese, then had an applesauce for a snack. For lunch I had some cereal. I did 30 minutes of exercise on the treadmill. I wanted to do more but I was very exhausted and decided not to push myself. However, I did exercise for 50 minutes yesterday so it's fine to me. Hopefully tonight I could get better rest and do 40-50 minutes exercise tomorrow.

I have been feeling better than ever. I am happier, positive, stronger. I am not stressed out or constantly negative anymore. Being with that person did me more harm than good. I am glad that I decided to move on and work on focusing on myself. I have opened my eyes and my heart. I have learned to accept myself and my past events. I feel at peace with myself. I no longer need to put up with negativity. I will keep thinking only positive thoughts no matter how difficult the situation may be. I will not let myself fall once again. My mistake was depending on the wrong person in order to find happiness. I just ended up losing myself to someone who walked all over me. Nobody should ever make others feel bad just to make themselves feel superior and good about them.

I now smile more often. I laugh more. I no longer cry myself to sleep. I no longer feel that I have to change to please others. I am slowly picking up the pieces and putting my life together again. I have finished my Bachelor's degree in nursing with cum laud. Soon I will take the nursing state test (dunno how it's called?) and eventually find a job. I cannot wait to move on and find a better future.

I now find things to focus on to distract my mind. I have been watching anime (something I never did before), crocheting, reading more often, exercising, cooking, etc. So far it has been working fine. I love who I have become. Thank you mom for giving me strength.

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nemesais

July 2015

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